Using White Space to Help Your Words Flow
Resisting the urge to include extensive detail
when writing a screenplay as you would when
writing a novel is a difficult challenge for
a screenwriter to overcome. Most writers who
choose the screenwriting field do so because
they "think in film" — they imagine their stories
unfolding shot by shot, scene by scene, image
by image.
The job of the screenwriter is to convey those
vivid images and scenes to the reader. This
is often confused with the director's job of
determining how certain scenes should be filmed.
Deciding where to place the cameras, which actors
to focus on, and when to pan or when to include
a close-up are all factors that will be up to
the director, not the writer.
So the question remains. How can you, as the
writer, direct the reader's mind to imagine
your film as you envisioned it, shot by shot
and image by image?
The answer — through the use of "white space."
One immediately noticeable difference between
script format and manuscript format is the amount
of "white space" included on every page of a
script. The ratio of blank space to text is
high.
White space is the screenwriter's ally.
How does the use of white space help you? First,
breaking your action and description into smaller
sections makes the script seem as if it reads
quickly, giving the reader the effect that your
story also moves quickly. A story that moves
quickly is more likely to hold a reader's attention.
Smaller sections of action draw the reader's
eye down the page. Screenwriters should make
their best effort to limit sections of action
and description to a maximum of five or six
lines. Several consecutive smaller sections
of action will appeal to a reader more than
one large paragraph of action.
Second, it provides the writer with a method
of delivering the story shot by shot, in essence
"directing" the film as it plays through the
reader's mind.
Screenwriters should not write the screenplay
by directing the camera shots, since describing
specific camera angles serves as a reminder
to the readers that they are reading a script.
Your goal is to get readers so caught up in
your story they forget they're reading a script.
Camera directions should be reserved for the
shooting script and the director. Screenwriters
must use the writing of action and description
to depict the story exactly as they want the
readers to see it in their minds. The best way
to achieve this is by breaking that description
into smaller pieces, illustrating the action
step by step based on how you envision the shots
on screen.
A terrific example of this can be found in
the following excerpt from Jeb Stuart's Die
Hard script. (Please note, due to how
some internet browsers display text, the following
segment should not be used as a guideline
for proper screenplay format.)
*****************
INT. LOBBY - SAME
The doors to a service elevator open TO REVEAL
HANS GRUBER, impeccably dressed, lean and handsome,
he steps out into the lobby like he owns the
building - and in a way he does.
Theo steps to the door of the control room
and tosses Hans a COMPUTER CARD.
Hans goes to the front door, waves the card
over a magnetic plate. An LED BLINKS and the
door LOCKS with a THUD.
Hans looks out at the street. Appropriately
enough, "not a creature is stirring." Century
City is quiet.
*****************
Notice that although this is one scene with
continuous action, the action is broken up into
smaller pieces. On the script page itself, none
of these sections of action is more than three
lines long. Each of those pieces represents
a shot:
Shot #1 - The elevator door opens and Hans
emerges.
Shot #2 - Theo enters the room and gives Hans
the computer card.
Shot #3 - Hans uses the card to lock the door.
Shot #4 - Hans surveys the quiet street.
As the reader, you get a clear mental image
of each shot as the action unfolds. Breaking
the description into smaller pieces does not
disrupt the flow of the action. In fact, it
propels the action forward. It reads quickly,
and offering the action in smaller segments
creates a rhythm.
Smaller sections also mean fewer words. As
a screenwriter you must learn to write economically
— using as few words as possible to describe
the action — and your description must be crafted
using the most vivid words you can find to portray
the image.
Standard disclaimer:
Please note, the web browser display does not
allow for the presentation of a screenplay in
its correct format. Excerpts and examples of
screenplays found in these articles should not
be used as examples of proper screenplay format.
To learn how to properly format your screenplay,
David Trottier's The
Screenwriter's Bible: A Complete Guide to Writing,
Formatting, and Selling Your Script is an
excellent reference.
© Kris Cramer. All rights reserved.
Reprinted here with the author's permission.
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