The Unnecessary "That"

While working as a freelance script consultant, it was my job to help writers raise the quality of their writing to the highest level attainable. In the course of any given day, I came across a problem appearing in each of the scripts crossing my desk, and I have since noticed the same problem cropping up in book after book.

The problem? The unnecessary "that."

It is a wonder how one little word could worm its way so firmly into the hearts and minds of writers, yet the word "that" has done just...well, that.

The word "that" has become so ingrained in our daily vocabulary it is difficult to recognize how often it is misused. It pops up in sentence upon sentence, yet nine times out of ten it is not needed. In a screenplay or manuscript, where space is limited and every inch of text is precious, unnecessary words are a death sentence. Consider the following sentence:

"She was so tired that she could have fallen asleep at the wheel."

Throwing a "that" into the middle of a sentence cuts sharply into the flow of the words, causing an unpleasant staccato effect. As writers, we want our words to roll smoothly through the reader's mind, flowing naturally from sentence to sentence. Writing visually requires flow. The choppy interruption caused by an unnecessary "that" is precisely what we strive to avoid.

Now, consider the same sentence with the word "that" removed:

"She was so tired she could have fallen asleep at the wheel."

Has the meaning been changed by removing the word "that"? No, not at all. In fact, the sentence has been streamlined and flows much more smoothly without the word "that" buried in the center.

In reviewing the common usage of the word "that," you'll find most instances of the word to be unwarranted. We have reached the point where we use it out of habit instead of necessity. The writing contained in a screenplay or manuscript should be based on necessity, on using as few words as possible to convey your intended meaning. Using "that" where it is not needed only detracts from the quality of your material.

Review your screenplays and manuscripts with a fine-toothed comb — or better yet, a red pen — and cross out every unnecessary "that" you encounter. If you're unsure of whether a "that" is really necessary, read the sentence aloud a few times, leaving out the word. If the sentence still makes sense without including the "that", the word isn't needed.

Here are a few examples to get you started on the path to eliminating the unnecessary "that":

UNNECESSARY

She told me that she would be home in time for dinner.

I can't believe that he's capable of murder.

He was at home the night that she was murdered.

Make sure that you know what sort of person you're dealing with.

She glances at the photo that is sitting on the nightstand.

NECESSARY

The minute he laid eyes on her, he realized he'd never truly loved anyone until that moment.

Do you remember what you saw that night?

That she had a fiery temper was already a well-known fact.

© Kris Cramer. All rights reserved.
Reprinted here with the author's permission.

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